Years ago, I left the world of pay for play, due to the issues, that Hilary is posting about on her blog. I have experienced the whole range of the so called top ten provider list? Her obstacle was and is, those pretenders, whom lack ethics, and are less than mature and professional.
And these phony individuals, are present on venues, such as the TER, and in the very community, that we frequent. My experience with some past escorts, who considered themselves professional Courtesans, proved to me, that the bar was set well to low, they were not professionals, No they were nothing but beautiful females, who had been blessed with looks, skin, tits and so on, with which they decided to offer to their time and services to men, for a price. There is one very particular provider, to this day I refuse to address her as an escort or courtesan who could talk the talk, but failed to deliver on the goods.
And yes her main goal in life, was to separate me and others from as much money as possible, with the least amount of effort, and do so, all while attempting to destroy men emotionally, and berate and belittle men, because of guys like me, who were able to love, cherish, and treasure a woman, even though she was a paid companion. That experience, resulted in me suffering harassment, humiliation, and loss of esteem, at the hands of a very cruel, hateful, phony, and back stabbing female.
An individual with whom I had trusted, and was dependent upon, to guard my personal information, and personal emotions, and treasure me for the person that I am. This kind of scene has played out many countless times, by many men and women, in the hobby world, as well as civilian life each and every day.
However, I am addressing the world of paid companionship, in this blog, because the idea of exchanging money, for time, and having the expectation, that both parties are aware of personal boundaries, and shall honor those boundaries, without fail. For one or the other to violate the boundary, brings drama, and hardship on so many levels, that one cannot even begin to imagine the amount of destruction that can be visited upon an individual by another.
As I experienced, so to have others, Hilary and myself are not isolated examples of others Bad behavior.
We were simply betrayed by others, who violated boundaries, due to their own insecurities, greed, or personality disorders, character flaws. I held up my end of the deal, and had been misled, led on, and eventually betrayed, and outed, for some twisted lie of what took place, as the transgressor attempted to twist the events around, in order to save face, and portray herself as a victim of unwanted attention by someone who had lost touch with reality?
Yet behind the scenes she was the one who instigated, and perpetuated the whole affair from stat to finish. That entire experience drove me away from the pay for play world, for what has been about 10 years now, and I am still very fearful of women in the paid companionship lifestyle. I have had an eye on Hilary, for quite some time, but because of my past experiences, as well as the drama that she encountered some years ago, led me to keep my distance.
I did so as I am lacking personal knowledge of Hilary, and of the past drama that took place. However, having seen her staying power, and her continued presence, while others have fell by the way side, lead me to conclude, that she, Hilary is on the up and up, and if there were ever any conflict, between parties, that I could count upon her, to own up to her own short comings, as I would do with mine.
My thanks to you, Hilary, for having opened this subject up to discussion, it leads me to think that you are not just blowing smoke, or putting forth another form of marketing of your services. A male figure comparable to the courtesan was the Italian cicisbeo , the French chevalier servant , the Spanish cortejo or estrecho. It actually seems that the figure of the chevalier servant French, literally "serving cavalier", lady's escort of a married lady was quite common in Europe up to the 18th century.
The courtesans of East Asia, particularly those of the Japanese empire , held a different social role than that of their European counterparts. Examples of Japanese courtesans included the oiran class, who were more focused on the aspect of entertainment in comparison with European courtesans. Today, the term courtesan has become a euphemism to designate a comforter, escort , mistress or a prostitute , especially one of dignified etiquette who attracts wealthy, powerful, or influential clients.
There were two types of courtesan. In the other was the cortigiana di lume , a lower class of courtesan. Although the latter was still considered better than an average courtesan [ citation needed ] , the former was the sort most often romanticized and treated more-or-less equal to women of the nobility. It is with this type of courtesan that the art of "courtisanerie" is best associated. The cortigiane oneste were usually well-educated and worldly sometimes even more so than the average upper-class woman , and often held simultaneous careers as performers or artists.
They were typically chosen on the basis of their "breeding"—social and conversational skills, intelligence, common-sense, and companionship—as well as their physical attributes. It was usually their wit and personality that set them apart from regular women. Sex constituted only a facet of the courtesan's array of services. For example, they were well-dressed and ready to engage and participate in a variety of topics ranging from art to music to politics.
In some cases, courtesans were from well-to-do backgrounds, and were even married—but to husbands lower on the social ladder than their clients. In these cases, their relationships with those of high social status had the potential to improve their spouses' status—and so, more often than not, the husband was aware of his wife's profession and dealings. Courtesans from non-wealthy backgrounds provided charming companionship for extended periods, no matter what their own feelings or commitments might have been at the time, and sometimes had to be prepared to do so on short notice.
They were also subject to lower social status, and often religious disapproval, because of the immoral aspects of their profession and their reliance upon courtisanerie as a primary source of income. In cases like this, a courtesan was solely dependent on her benefactor or benefactors financially, making her vulnerable; Cora Pearl is a good example. Often, courtesans serving in this capacity began their career as a prostitute, although many came to the "profession" by other means.
It was not uncommon for a courtesan to enter into an arranged long-term liaison by contract with a wealthy benefactor. These contracts were written up by and witnessed by lawyers, and were binding. Most included some provision for the financial welfare of the courtesan beyond the end of the relationship in the form of an annuity. It is interesting that many such women became so powerful socially and financially that they could be particular about the men they associated with; in other words they chose their paramour as would any other mistress, not the other way around.
Wealthy benefactors would go to great lengths to court a courtesan as a prize, the ultimate goal being a long-term contract as a mistress. Occasionally courtesans were passed from one benefactor to another, thereby resulting in them being viewed in society circles as lower than both their benefactor and those of wealth and power with whom they would socialize. Often, in instances of this sort, if the courtesan had satisfactorily served a benefactor, that benefactor would, when ending the affair, pass them on to another benefactor of wealth as a favor to the courtesan, or set them up in an arranged marriage to a semi-wealthy benefactor.
In the event that the courtesan had angered or dissatisfied a benefactor, they would often find themselves cast out of wealthy circles, returning more often than not to street prostitution.
They were more respected by their extramarital companions, both placing one another's family obligations ahead of the relationship and planning their own liaisons or social engagements around the lovers' marital obligations.
Affairs of this sort would often be short-lived, ending when either the courtesan or the courtesan's spouse received the status or political position desired, or when the benefactor chose the company of another courtesan, and compensated the former companion financially.
In instances like this, it was often viewed simply as a business agreement by both parties involved. The benefactor was aware of the political or social favors expected by the courtesan, the courtesan was aware of the price expected from them for those favors being carried out, and the two met one another's demands, an example being Madame de Pompadour.
This was generally a safe affair, as both the benefactor's spouse and the courtesan's spouse usually were fully aware of the arrangement, and the courtesan was not solely dependent on the benefactor. It, rather, was simply an affair of benefits gained for both those involved. Publicly and socially, affairs of this sort were common during the 17th, 18th and 19th centuries, as well as the early 20th century, and were generally accepted in wealthy circles.
Very often, courtesans would betray one another in acts of political intrigue in attempts to climb into higher positions of power within royal courts. There are many cases throughout history where one courtesan would attempt sometimes successfully to supplant the mistress to a king or emperor...
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